Dear Mr Rosen,
We agree, Mr ZIP is a pretty slick customer.
He greases locks, eases cables and doors, lubricates machinery, removes rust, shaves legs (a depilatory manufacturer tells us), expedites delivery of the mails, and encourages the use of the telephone Yellow Pages to locate zoning maps.
In everything he undertakes, he accomplishes it well, if advance reports are indicative.
But one slip by Mr. ZIP and we would have a fly in our ointment.
So at the risk of sounding unctuous, I would like to congratulate you on the smooth manner in which you accept our free-wheeling symbol of faster mail service.
I am happy to see that there is no friction between us.
Thanks kindly for your nice letter of December 12 and, on behalf on the Post Office Department, let me congratulate you for mailing it oily.
Sincerely yours,
J. Edward Day
P.S. I’m glad to see that many people are still using that greasy kid stuff.